如何写出被名牌大学认可的个人陈述（Personal Statement，以下简称PS）？该如何下笔？我们来看看行业专家在结构、内容方面给出的建议，以及哪些雷区要尽量避开。

内幕人士观点

1.个人陈述看似公式化，但对决策过程至关重要，而且招生导师真的会去花时间阅读这些陈述，不要以为这只是走个过场。

2.如果你申请的是热门课程，你的个人陈述将可能是决定你是否获得面试的决定因素。

格洛斯特郡大学市场和学生招聘总监James Seymour分享了一些准备个人陈述的小贴士，希望能给正在准备写PS的同学们一点帮助。

一.哪些内容能撑起一篇漂亮的个人陈述？

“这是你展示你的学习热情和决心的机会，向我们展示你能为大学增加什么价值。在绝大多数情况下，大学都在想办法向你提供入读机会，而不是拒绝你——个人陈述是你让他们更容易做出这个决定的机会”

首先，你得要阐明你为何要申请这个课程，James给出了一些小贴士告诉你哪些内容必须要包括进去，我们一起来看看：

解释一下你选择这门课程的原因以及它如何符合您对未来的期许；
给出与课程相关的学术或工作经验；
显示出你知道课程将涉及哪些内容，并提及你感兴趣的任何特殊科目；
通过列出你担任过的任何职位、团队或社团成员以及兴趣和爱好来证明你是谁，你是什么样的人；
在你所选的五个 UCAS 中尽量保持一致。如果你的其他选择以及其给出的相关参考完全不同，这会很难说服招生导师来相信你是认真的。如果你的选择不同，那么你最好在陈述中解释这一点。招生导师不知道你申请的其他大学，或者你的首选大学，但是请你务必要保持一致。
尽量做到清晰和简洁。因为UCAS招生越来越无纸化，所以大多数招生导师/官员会在电脑屏幕上阅读你的PS。

“解释你可以给课程带来什么，并尝试不只是列出经验，但描述他们如何给你技能并且能给你在大学的学习和研究生活中带来帮助”。

不要只写：我是中学国际象棋俱乐部的成员。我也在管弦乐队演奏单簧管。

但你可以这样写：中学期间我接触了国际象棋，这大大提高了我解决问题的水平，因为国际象棋很需要选手具备专注和具有分析思维的能力。而且我还习惯于作为一个团队的一员而工作，因为我在中学管弦乐队演奏单簧管，并与他人合作，这样我们才能完成演出。

二.招生导师会看你的个人陈述中的哪些点？

为了决定你是否合适，大学和学院对你如何表达你的学术记录和潜力很感兴趣。这应该由你给出的的参考作为支持。

那些从事招生工作的人会很在意如下几点，他们会在你的PS中去找能证明你具备这些能力的内容，列表如下：

学习动力和决心
领导才能，团队精神以及沟通技能
在你所选学科所进行的相关研究
任何相关的关键技能

其实，招生导师不是在寻求诺贝尔奖获得者。他们要看的是你对你申请的这门课程的热情，以及你为什么适合研究它。你可以为这门课程增加什么价值？

在你提笔撰写PS时，请务必记住这些。

James 还和我们分享了两篇例文，一篇是好的例文，一篇是不是太尽如人意的。

例文1 （优秀）

点评：开篇对课程有很好的理解，对自己的评估很中肯。给出的专业背景适合本课程需要。举实例以支持观点。

例文2（有待提高）

点评：太多不相关的信息，无需列出A-level, 实例陈旧，语法和拼写均有错误，态度不够积极。

三.构建和准备个人陈述

你也许有相当出色的相关经验，但是如果你没有很好地表达出来的话，那结果会大打折扣。所以，你如何准备你的PS这一步就会显得至关重要。而且你也可以将其运用于其他用途，如空档年申请、工作、实习、学徒培训，并将其存档以供将来申请。

要记住：没有一种所谓的"正确"的方式来构建个人陈述。

但你在写的时候最好包括以下内容：

•一个明确的开题，解释为什么你想学习这门课程

•花大约3/4强调你的学术技能，以证明你有能力来研究这门课

•大约1/4可以写关于任何课外活动，以显示还有什么让你适合

•一个明确的结论。

四.个人称述中撰写中的“要”与“不要”

要

将陈述计划为一篇论文或申请工作/奖学金的申请信
考虑将语句分成五或六段，如果适当的话，加上标题
清晰，简洁，点和事实越集中，说服力越强
使用积极的词语，如achieved, developed, learned, discovered, enthusiasm, commitment, energy, fascination… 实现，发展，学习，发现，热情，承诺，精力，魅力……
避免过度精心策划华丽的语言。相反，尽量做到语言朴实，句式简单
如果可能，尽量带入一点个人风格，但要小心幽默和健谈的方法
拼写和语法确实很重要——不要害怕草稿的次数，越多越好。而且尽量请别人帮忙校对并给以建议
在 2020/21 年期间，以积极的方式介绍 COVID-19 封城期间面临的挑战

不要

东拉西扯
夸大其词
给人的印象是自命不凡
尝试包含生活历史
开篇"我一直想成为一个……"
使用噱头或引文，除非它们非常相关，并且以显示你的品质的方式处理它们
试图购买或复制个人陈述——剽窃软件现在是非常复杂的，一旦被发现，那么你的申请也就无望了
找借口，比如没有办法获得相关工作经验，或者有些事情无法完成，不如花些笔墨写你在逆境中能够做到的事情，例如新冠影响

最后，詹姆斯还给我们提供了一些实例，以帮助我们在写PS时更好地避免那些雷区。

“I enjoy the theatre and used to go a couple of times a year. (Drama)”

我喜欢剧院，过去一年去几次。（戏剧）

“I am a keen reader and am committed to the study of human behaviour through TV soaps!”

我很爱读书，致力于通过电视肥皂剧研究人类的行为！

“I have led a full life over the last 18 years and it is a tradition I intend to continue.”

在过去的18年里，我过得很充实，而且我也愿意继续这样的生活方式。

"I describe myself in the following two words: 'TO ODIN!' the ancient Viking war cry." (Law)

我用以下两个词来形容自己：致ODIN, 那伟大的古老的维京战争在呐喊！（法律）

“My favourite hobby is bee-keeping and I want to be an engineer.”

我最喜欢的爱好是养蜂，我想成为一名工程师。（不想当厨子的司机不是好战士？）

“My interest in Medicine stems from my enjoyment of Casualty and other related TV series.”

我对医学的兴趣源于我对电视剧Casualty（伤亡）和其他相关电视连续剧的享受。（你不是在申请戏剧系）

“I have always had a passion to study Medicine, failing that, Pharmacy. (A student putting Pharmacy as her fifth choice after four medical school choices – Pharmacy can be just as popular and high status as Medicine.)”

我一直对学习医学（而非药学）充满热情。（一个学生在选了四个医学院以后才将药学作为她的第五选择。药学其实有着和医学一样都是地位很高的学科，而且它的受欢迎程度也并不比医学差。

五.一些最终建议

最重要的是，请记住，个人陈述是你说服大学它为什么应该为你提供入学的机会。因此，尽量让你的PS引人注目，这样你的机会才更大。

下面我们来看看两篇范文：

第一篇是经济学申请者

来源作者：Mopac

Economics Personal Statement

Having been born in the UK, with parents from Delhi and Kenya, I feel my background has given me an internationally diverse outlook. In my travels, I have met with both the affluence of Europe and the poverty existing in India. Such contrasts have compelled me to seek an understanding of the forces that drive the world economy, and why after centuries of economic theory such inequalities continue to exist.

Over the summer, I have been researching India's economic development, partly stimulated by the issues above. The Indian economy is a fascinating topic for me, not just due to my heritage, but because of the juxtaposition between rapid increases in wealth on the one hand and the Sub-Saharan African levels of poverty on the other. Another part of economics I find appealing is the use of theories. I have been introduced to the Tragedy of the Commons and the Coase Theorem's take on externalities. My interest in strategic decision-making has been boosted by Game Theory, which has developed an understanding of the situations faced by oligopolies and the implications of Nash equilibrium. Such theoretical models have led me to Experimental Economics and Charles Holt's 'Markets, Games and Strategic Behaviour', in an attempt to see if people actually behave in the way theory predicts.

My internet browser's homepage is set to prompt me with the latest headlines from the BBC Business website, as it is a priority for me to keep up-to-date with the world around me. In addition, for different opinions, I also frequently read articles on economics in various newspapers. Reading books by economists, such as John Kay, has led me to appreciate better how concepts have developed over time. These include 'The Penguin History of Economics' by Backhouse and Levitt's 'Freakonomics', which I found entertaining, but thought lacked true economic substance. Besides reading, my other hobbies include remixing music on the computer and using Investopedia.com, on which I have a virtual portfolio of shares. As a representative of my college's debating team, my communication skills have greatly improved. At our next debate, I will be arguing for the wider use of congestion charges.

The recent economic turmoil has reinforced my belief in how economics is truly an integral part of our lives. University will provide the ideal environment in which to strengthen and test my understanding of such a discipline, whilst being a place where I can formulate and contribute my own theories to the subject. After receiving full marks in AS-level Economics, I have set myself a high standard, and I wish to continue my ambitions in the finance industry. However, I recognise that my passion for economics will lead me to many more career horizons.

作者最后同时得到了三个大学的offer，分别是牛津大学，伦敦商学院，华威大学。

第二篇来自数学系申请者

来源作者：popa_dom

Maths Personal Statement

The idea of proof has always held a real fascination for me. The process of starting from a simple set of axioms and deriving almost any mathematical truth (putting Godel to one side) is what truly separates Mathematics from any other subject. It is the closest we can ever get to absolute truth, and therein lies its sheer beauty and the reason it is the only subject for me. Of course, it's also a good deal of fun.

I have tried to extend my Maths as much as possible beyond the classroom, and whenever I do so I uncover either some completely new and intriguing area of Mathematics or a very neat trick I hadn't thought of in more familiar territory.

One example of this is my attendance at weekly lectures given by the department of Mathematics at Bristol University, covering topics from the Mathematics of juggling to quantum mechanics, although some of my favourites have been those on the less exotic "inequalities", which taught me a lot about thinking about problems creatively.

I also attended a summer school run by the National Academy of Gifted and Talented Youth at the University of Durham, where I spent two weeks being introduced to various approachable first year undergraduate topics such as proof by induction, Markov chains and using Maple.

This experience not only allowed me to discover areas of Mathematics I would not otherwise have encountered, but also gave me a small taste of university life, as there was a large number of us living in one of the colleges.

I am also involved in the UKMT mentoring scheme, whereby each month I am given a sheet of questions in areas not touched on at A level, such as geometry and number theory, giving me a good opportunity to explore new mathematical ideas myself, and gain a much deeper appreciation of the interconnections within Mathematics and the creation of proofs.

I am a member of the school's Maths team and we are regularly successful in competing against teams from other schools in the area. I also attend STEP sessions at local schools when available, as I find the questions much more interesting than the standard A level ones, and thinking about how to solve them has greatly improved my rigour in approaching problems.

Among the mathematical books I have read, I enjoyed "Godel, Escher, Bach", which gives a good grounding in axiomatic reasoning and formal systems, whilst at the same time pointing out their major flaw. I also liked "To infinity and beyond" by Eli Maor, which deals with the concept of infinity, its implications and its paradoxes, both in Maths and elsewhere.

I particularly enjoy the pure side of the A level syllabus, especially trigonometry and calculus, as they involve a certain degree of proof and introduce new concepts.

I believe my other academic subjects all complement Mathematics as they are about finding ways of describing reality, be it through language in French or through equations and models in Physics and Chemistry. I find Critical Thinking especially relevant as it is about the construction of sound logical arguments, an art lying at the heart of Mathematics in proof. I have achieved an A grade in all modules across all my subjects.

In my spare time, I practise kickboxing, and have competed in various local competitions. As a volunteer, I am involved in a year seven Maths mentoring scheme and help at a homeless shelter.

I enjoy travelling, and will be going to Nicaragua for a month after my A levels to help in a small village, explore the local jungles and volcanoes and practise my Spanish. I lived in France from the ages of 9 to 12, and learnt to adapt to a new language and culture.

I very much look forward to exploring the new ideas of University level Mathematics, and playing a full part in University life.

注：本文作者最后拿到了他/她申请的所有学校的offer，列表如下：

Oxford University

The University of DurhamUniversity College LondonThe University of WarwickImperial College LondonThe University of Edinburgh

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