他是好莱坞传奇影帝，却与亲生女儿断交20年！不是所有父亲都会爱孩子（附视频&演讲稿）

The striking sapphire-blue eyes, fine bone structure and almost spectrally pale skin all leave no doubt that the pair are father and daughter.

Pictured together on the red carpet, Sir Anthony Hopkins, 80, and his only child, Abigail, now 48, look loving and relaxed in each other’s company.

In one pose, both are laughing, their noses crinkled in exactly the same spot. She cocks her head towards him, while he wraps an arm fondly round her waist. In another shot, he is the proud father, pointing towards her — as if deflecting the spotlight from himself.

And even then, it was far from the portrait of familial affection it seemed. The Oscar-winning Welsh actor is renowned for putting on a good show, after all.

For behind the scenes he and Abigail, now a singer-songwriter and acting coach, have had a fractured and acrimonious relationship for almost the entirety of her life. Despite a brief rapprochement in the Nineties, when she had roles in two of Sir Anthony’s films — Shadowlands and The Remains Of The Day, both in 1993 — the pair have barely spoken for two decades and remain bitterly estranged.

In fact, so absent are relations between the two that, in an extraordinary callous remark, Sir Anthony admitted he didn’t know whether Abigail had any children — and didn’t care.

Asked by the Radio Times this week whether or not he was a grandfather, he replied: ‘I don’t have any idea. People break up. Families split and, you know: “Get on with your life.” People make choices. I don’t care one way or the other.’

Sir Anthony — who, with some irony, stars in the BBC’s forthcoming adaptation of King Lear, a Shakespearean villain famously driven mad by his fraught relationship with his daughters — also admitted that he didn’t have any idea where his daughter lived.

Friends say Abigail, who lives in London, will be deeply upset by her father’s heartless comments — even after so many years of animosity. ‘She is still very hurt by the whole thing,’ one says. ‘Her relationship with him — or the lack of it — has had a big impact on her life.

That pain started tragically early in Abigail’s life. The daughter of Sir Anthony and English actress Petronella Barker, his first wife, whom he met on stage and married in 1966, she was born in 1969. Cracks had begun to appear in the marriage after just two months and, according to Hopkins’s biographer Quentin Falk, news of Petronella’s pregnancy made him ‘so tense he was like a bottle of soda that was about to explode’.

Abigail’s birth didn’t save the marriage — far from it. Already successful on the stage (Sir Anthony had a breakthrough as Laurence Olivier’s understudy in 1967 and joined the Royal National Theatre in London), he began spending long periods away from home and turned to drink to cope with his mounting workload.

His addiction soon spiralled, with reports he was working his way through a bottle of tequila a day. He insists this is exaggerated. ‘I was never falling-down-in-the-gutter drunk,’ he has said. ‘Rather, I’d get boring, aggressive and stupid.’

The pair briefly reconnected in the 1990s and she appeared in two of his films, Shadowlands and The Remains Of The Day. However, they quickly became estranged again

In a 2005 interview, Sir Anthony admitted he was at the ‘height of my self-destructive behaviour’ at the time.

‘I was arrogant and I was out of it because I was so scared,’ he said. ‘I see young kids today freak out, and I suppose I was like that.

‘I thought I knew it all, so my relationship with theatre companies and directors was pretty rocky. I drank too much and nearly damaged my health and my life.’

In fact, it was because of alcohol that he met his second wife, Jenni Lynton, a secretary at Pinewood Studios, who was asked to collect the actor from Heathrow airport after he got so drunk that he missed a flight in 1970.

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Unsurprisingly, future contact between Sir Anthony and Petronella was intermittent at best. Abigail, growing up in Putney, South-West London, with her mother, says she has no real memories of life as a family.

‘I would see him, but maybe once a year,’ she revealed in a 2005 interview, her only one on the subject to date. ‘There is a little bit of sadness, but I have to get on with my life. It has always been like that. See him, and then not.’

As Sir Anthony’s profile grew, he and Jenni decided to move to America, where they settled in Los Angeles, carving an even greater chasm between himself and his only child.

His drinking escalated, and he began to go on vodka and tequila binges, later admitting to hallucinating and, on one occasion, waking up in a hotel in Phoenix, Arizona, with no recollection of how he’d got there. ‘I had never been around anyone who drank like him,’ Jenni said in a 2004 interview.

‘We’d go out to dinner and he’d order a bottle of wine. Before we got half-way through, he’d order another. If we went to a party, he never wanted to come home.’

In 1975, he finally came to his senses — and gave up alcohol for good.

Back in London, Abigail was growing ever more distant from her father. ‘She never forgave him for the way he treated her mother,’ a friend explains. ‘She blamed him for his lack of love and kindness and she never got over that.

‘She felt that he had abandoned them while he went off to Hollywood to make a name for himself. Even when he was in contact, he was never really “there”.

‘He always wanted to be somebody else, to be on stage. He didn’t like reality. Unfortunately that meant he didn’t really like being a husband or a father either.’

There were, even then, similarities between the two. Abigail, who describes herself as a ‘solitary child’, found solace in music — first the piano and then, from the age of seven, the guitar, a love she inherited from her father.

Before he became an actor, Sir Anthony — who has composed several pieces of music — trained to be a concert pianist. ‘It’s all in the genes,’ Abigail has said. ‘There have been more than a few parallels.’

In 1985, when she was 16, she and her father had a major row, reportedly over his treatment of her mother, now 75, to whom she has always been fiercely loyal.

Two years later, while studying English at the University of East Anglia, Abigail suffered a breakdown — something she attributed to their troubled relationship. ‘I bottled up so much emotion in my childhood, it caused my mind to go,’ she told an interviewer. ‘I came very close to killing myself. It was the worst time I can remember. I totally abused my mind and body.

‘The root cause was the fact that my father and I had an intermittent relationship when I was young. I was angry and there was a lot of grieving going on.’

Later, in 2005, she backtracked, insisting she did not try to kill herself. ‘It was a relatively short addiction,’ she insisted. ‘A six-month spell that a lot of 18-year-olds go through — amphetamines, booze. It was a depressing time. I think some of that is genetic.’

Her father, meanwhile, was battling demons of his own. One night in 1982, he told Jenni he was going for a drive — and decamped to a house in the mountains, where he stayed for five months. Jenni moved back to London, while he had an affair with Joyce Ingalls, an actress and model he met at Alcoholics Anonymous (though the couple’s unconventional marriage would continue, long-distance, until 2002). Next, he threatened to give up acting, before moving to a New Age haven in the desert, where he lived as a penniless hippy for two months.

Somehow, amidst his chaotic existence, his acting continued to flourish, with roles opposite Shirley MacLaine, Mel Gibson and Emma Thompson throughout the Eighties and Nineties.

It was in 1990 that his daughter, who had decided to go into acting herself, got in touch. Then going by the name Abigail Harrison, an attempt to distance herself from her famous roots, she decided it was time to build bridges.

Sir Anthony described their meeting after so many years as ‘earth-shattering’ — and went on to persuade directors to give her cameo roles in Shadowlands, the C.S. Lewis biopic, and novel adaptation The Remains Of The Day. Reportedly, he also bought Abigail a flat to help her get on her feet.

She said acting alongside him was ‘a bonding as well as an educational experience’, but admitted they barely spoke on set. ‘He kept himself to himself, and I kept myself to myself,’ she said.

As her career blossomed her father, by then an American citizen, would slip quietly into theatres up and down the country to watch her on stage whenever he was in the UK.

But old arguments soon reared their head. The truce proved temporary, visits dwindled — and in 2001 communication between the pair ceased completely.

The following year, Sir Anthony appeared on a U.S. radio show pleading for his daughter to get in touch. ‘I guess we are estranged,’ he said. ‘I don’t think she wants to know very much. I hope she is well. I hope she is OK.

‘The divorce with her mother was a long time ago. She has probably got good reasons. She is too busy and all that. She has to do her own thing. I think she is in England somewhere. Wherever you are Abigail, I wish you luck.’

He sounded sincere, but Abigail — who moved into the music industry and set up her own record label in 2003 — may well have seen echoes of a man who, despite his protestations, seemed unable to change his ways. By now twice-divorced and proclaiming himself ‘not good at any kind of relationship with people’, he was soon getting married again, this time to Stella Arroyave — a Columbian antiques-dealer-turned-actress 18 years his junior — in 2003.

Unlike his two previous marriages, this one seems to be lasting the course. Sir Anthony has praised Stella for helping him put his ‘wild ways’ behind him, and in 2013 the pair celebrated their ten-year wedding anniversary with a blessing in his native Pembrokeshire — a ceremony to which Abigail did not receive an invitation.

Over the years, he has blamed his volatile personal relationships on a number of things: a difficult upbringing (he reportedly hated boarding school, which deprived him of ‘any idea of family loyalty’); bullying (classmates nicknamed him ‘Mad Hopkins’) and, most recently, being diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome, a neurological condition which affects social interaction.

‘As a child, I was very isolated and I’ve never really been close to anyone,’ he said in a 2012 interview. ‘Ask nothing, expect nothing. That’s my creed.

‘Although I may have tried to present myself with warmth and a friendliness, inside I always felt empty — no compassion, just carelessness all my life.’

For her part, Abigail seems to have resigned herself to her father’s attitude.

Friends say she doesn’t willingly admit they are related; even her website — where she promotes her folk-rock music — simply makes reference to a ‘theatrical background’, though she has reverted to using the Hopkins surname.

He has, apparently, never watched her perform her music, despite several of his trips to London coinciding with her gigs in the capital’s clubs.

‘Oh God, I can’t really see him at a gig,’ she said in 2006, following her admission that she would have been happy to see her father in the crowd. ‘I didn’t expect him to come, not really.’

For the record — and indeed Sir Anthony’s information — she does not have any children of her own.

Given his dire performance as a father, it is perhaps no bad thing that grandparenthood is one role that has eluded him.

其实他们父女之间，也不是没有过天伦之乐。1966年霍普金斯和第一任妻子、英国演员Petronella Barker结婚，3年后有了Abigali。

在Abigali蹒跚学步的时候，霍普金斯也像所有宠爱女儿的爸爸一样，任由她好奇地看着世界，而他就是背后最强健的后盾。

但幸福总是太短。Abigail 一岁多的时候，父母就因为感情不和而离婚，母亲带着她离开，从此霍普金斯再没提及关于她的任何一件事。

或许是婚姻失败带来的痛苦，那时霍普金斯终日沉浸在抑郁之中，每天沉浸在酒精和毒品带来的迷醉中。

1970年，他又和一位年轻的秘书Jenni Lynton谈起了恋爱，1973年就结婚了，从此，前妻和女儿都成了不愿提起的历史。

Abigali跟着母亲在伦敦长大。记忆中，父亲总是缺席。她总是好奇，为何别的小伙伴，放了学总有爸爸来接，周末也是爸爸妈妈一同带着游玩，而她只能和妈妈相伴。

她会为爸爸找很多借口：或许是他工作太忙了，总要飞来飞去；也可能因为他在美国生活，不能经常来看她和妈妈……

再大一点的时候，她终于意识到，爸爸这么做，不是工作太忙，只是因为心里没有她。

这样的事实，让Abigali非常痛苦。没有孩子不渴望爸爸的保护和亲近，更何况她从没得到过这样的温暖，更加想要了解，被爸爸抱在臂弯里是什么感觉……

青春期的Abigali，过早地走上了父亲的老路：她抽烟、酗酒、嗑药，想用叛逆的沉沦洗刷掉痛苦。

但更加痛苦的是，作为名人的父亲又无处不在。每次当她想要忘掉，假装自己没有爸爸，那张和她几乎一样的脸，又会出现在商场大屏、家里的电视，或者巴士广告上。

1985年，Abigali和父亲见面了，但并不温馨。父亲对母亲颇有微词，这令渴望和睦家庭关系的女儿感到绝望。父女大吵一架，不欢而散。

接下来的两年，走入大学的Abigali频频逃课，被当成问题学生，学校不愿接纳她。已经重度抑郁的她，童年时就有的恐惧、悲伤再次缠绕着她，她不得不尝试自杀，以解决父女之间的纠葛。只是这一切，父亲对此毫不关心。

最绝望的人生莫过于，无法被父亲接纳，也无法摆脱他的影响吧。Abigali不仅五官像霍普金斯，也继承了他的才气。

她对演戏同样有极好的天赋。1993年，Abigali24岁的时候，霍普金斯邀请她客串了自己的两部经典影片，《长日留痕》和《影子大地》。父女俩的关系才有了一丝丝回温。

那可能是这对父女这一生，为数不多的温存了。从合影来看，他们也是享受过身为父女的愉快的。

只是多数时候，两人的关系仍然有如冰山，冷酷到近乎无情。Abigali早早改了姓，叫自己Abigali Harrison，生硬地与父亲断了联系。

霍普金斯演戏前，是优秀的钢琴手，Abigali也在父亲的影响下，7岁就对音乐有敏锐的感知。长大以后，她组乐队，玩吉他，成了一名优秀的歌手。

2005年，Abigali开演唱会时，霍普金斯就在隔了一条街的地方，举行电影《世上最快的印第安摩托》首映式。活动结束时，影帝像下班了一样悠然离开，丝毫没有要去看看女儿演出的意思。

尽管他给了她生命，但也确实不在乎，这个女孩和他的人生有何干系。

在霍普金斯看来，“你不用爱你的家人。孩子也不必爱他们的父亲。没必要相亲相爱。”而当被人指出，这样的说法很冷酷，他无所谓地表示：“嗯……是很冷酷，人生本就冷酷。”

家庭、亲情这样的暖色调的词语，在霍普金斯的人生中几乎不存在。

难道人生如戏，演过的角色最终都会和演员合为一体？莫非因为他演过凶残的食人狂魔、冷酷无情的大boss，就得变成这样的角色？

当然不是所有的演员都会这样冷血。霍普金斯对家人的疏离，其实也是来自于原生家庭。亲情这种东西就是奢侈品，对他来说太昂贵了。父亲是烘焙师，在霍普金斯童年记忆中，他很小就被送去了寄宿学校，并没有多少与家人温存的画面。

家人经常拿他和表哥作比较，给他起了难听的昵称Dumbo，评价他“脑袋大，不知道里面装了啥”，却夸表哥“真聪明”。

学习成绩也不好，老师会打他的头以惩罚他，拧着他的耳朵嘲讽打击：你只配给你爹的面包涂黄油。这些侮辱性的话，让小霍普金斯变得敏感多疑，他不相信这个世上会有善意。

尽管与钢琴为伴，因此变得才华横溢，但孤独才是他童年的主题。

童年的孤单无助支配着他的一生，让霍普金斯对自己的定位是“终其一生都是局外人”。

能成功塑造出这些成功的冷血角色，或许也是因为，霍普金斯能轻易地将自己从情感中抽离，不带任何情绪地看待所要诠释的人物。

年迈的霍普金斯，对这一生也会有所困惑。他曾问自己：“我特么到底是怎么走到这一步的？”甚至在他回首的时候，会感到彷徨，仰头问上帝，“看我经历了怎样的人生逆旅”，不知令他感到唏嘘的，是否包括关于女儿的记忆……

而他年岁渐高，反而越来越忙，让自己完全围着工作转，也是在有意无意地逃离平凡生活吧，逃离那些与家人坐在一起、欢声笑语的人间烟火。

娱乐圈，子承父业的明星父子父女并不少见，更何况是影帝级人物，本能给孩子更丰富的资源，更广阔的环境。

像老爷子和Abigali这样的父女，大概也是娱乐圈最不寻常的家人了吧。上一对闹得最凶的父女，莫过于安吉丽娜·朱莉和她的影帝老爹。朱莉甚至请求法庭去掉她父亲的姓，要断绝父女关系。

但再不愉快如是，也终有和解的一天——媒体能频频拍到朱莉带着爸爸和女儿逛街的情景，大约是朱莉生了孩子之后，越发了解为人父母的不易。

这样的反转能发生在霍普金斯父女身上吗？今年49岁的Abigali，谈及父亲还是对他留有一丝温情：“我还是爱着他的，希望他好过”。到底是小棉袄，尽管父女关系冰冻，也依然对父爱留有一丝向往。

而老爷子呢？多年来一直对女儿的一切保持着冷感，不关心死活，更不会主动提起。直到2002年的一次采访，霍普金斯才多少承认，自己是个生来自私的人，“我不是一个好丈夫，也不是好爸爸。”

尽管让人遗憾，不过既然父女缘浅，与其纠缠伤害，倒不如相忘于江湖，各自安好吧……