雅思写作中有些错误是一定要避免的。上次说的五个,如果还没看,建议先看一下:五个要避免的错误01~05。 今天再讲五个要注意的错误。
常见错误6: 词组不够正式
As we know, the Internet is really convenient way to make links to people all over the world.

注意,as we know在雅思作文中属于非正式用语,不建议使用。这句话完全可以改为:It is a fact that the Internet is really convenient way to make links to people all over the world. 当你忍不住想用as we know的时候, 就换成it is a fact that的结构,会让句子很快具备雅思作文的气质。


常见错误7: 论据过于累赘
The internet is a more efficient way that can use in the workplace. For example, when I have a new idea or new updates during the program, I can fast send an email to my team members or our group leader just through the internet simply.

这句话论据部分相当拖沓,似乎是一个人站在你面前和你口述而非书写。一定要注意精简自己的文字,优化自己的表达。

The internet is a more efficient way that can use in the workplace. Cooperation between people in different countries was much more difficult when communication was limited to written letters or telegrams. Nowadays, interactions by email, phone or video are almost as good as face-to-face meetings, and many of us benefit from these interactions, either in work or social contexts.
常见错误8: 观点包含内容太多
By removing school grades and building more standard schools, encouraging more school activities and reducing unnecessary tests, children would feel an air of enjoyment and relief.

注意,句子前半部分分别列出了四个solution,而无一例外统统没有进行论证。这四个方面都是截然不同的,用by…,…and..的结构,代表他们都是并列关系,那么四个不同的方面列在一起,你必须要有针对性的论证,才能增加solution的可信度。所以雅思作文中一定不要这么去写。一般,写一个solution + reason + result是最佳选择。

Firstly, parents should create a mentally and physically healthy domestic environment, involving a balance between learning and relaxing. Cooling-down activities such as sports, drawing or traveling, which are normally affordable, can release the stress of children brought on by both academic and social burdens.
常见错误9: Introduction随意改动题目背景
题目:Instead of asking the government to bear the cost of higher education, students should pay tuition fees themselves. Do you agree or disagree with the statement

作者文章开头第一句:
Currently, an increasing number of governments start to bear the cost of higher education.

注意an increasing number of governments是题目中并没有提及。而且作者整句话的意思是,越来越多政府开始承担高等教育的经费。这显然和题目讨论的话题也不符合。开头这么写,你会输在起跑线上。

可以改为: 
Free tertiary education has always sparks heated debates all over the world
. higher education = tertiary education. 同时题目中ask the government to bear以及pay tuition fees themselves代表了两方观点。你只要写成has sparks heated debates就可以完美取代题目,实现改写目的。这是通用的。
常见错误10: 句子过于直译
Firstly, the government paying tuition fees can help students get rid of the problems caused by how to get their tuition fees.

这句话很典型从中文直接翻译过来。而且作者这句话能看出,作为段落第一句话,这里提到了get rid of the problems,限制了后文只能列举那些因为付学费而带来的问题,非常不利于其他观点的插入。建议改为:

First of all, the main reason why I am favor of educational spending being supported by the government is that it can help students to concentrate totally on their study without being concerned about the fees.

当你提笔想写下一句话,可又发现自己似乎写的很基础,很直白怎么

办?方法很简单,首先想一想这句话中主谓宾定状补分别是什么,除

了直白的表达方式,还有其他句子结构可以替代吗?比如案例中,the

government paying tuition 改为 the main reason why I am favor of

educational spending being supported by the government.
今天就讲这五个错误,各位考鸭不妨再对照下自己的作文,看看是否也存在这样的问题。明天继续说雅思写作一定要避免的错误11~15。感觉有用的话,希望大家点赞转发一下,让更多自己的同学朋友也避免这些错误。

当然,如果你想系统提升自己的雅思写作能力;想早日拿到目标分,和雅思分手;但又怕花钱却不见效果,那么,下面这套雅思写作保分课程可以考虑一下哟!(可先试听感受教学效果)。
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